shark bytes

YES! Among all the other Super Bowl moments (tough break there, Seahawks fans) I have to thank Katy Perry and the NFL for finally giving Selachian-Americans representation on television.

They even got one that dances about as well as I do!

Okay, people worship some odd deities at times, but Prince Philip?

'We want him to spend the last years of his life here, because we believe that when he returns as our god, his powers will make our wrinkles disappear and we will have many wives to attend to our every need. He won't have to hunt for pigs or anything. He can just sit in the sun and have a nice time.'

Derek Zumsteg of USS Mariner has way too much time on his hands.

I mean it. Way, way too much time.

How do I know this? He's done a long statistical analysis of a baseball game in a Bugs Bunny cartoon.

This is absolutely hysterical. Imagine a baseball game report written by the Mythbusters teamed up with Bill James. Add Bugs Bunny. Stir.

We open to see "a screaming liner" hit by the home team. The outcome of the hit is not defined, and the hit itself seems an indicator that the game was not official: the ball appears to be a shade of grey, and makes an almost-human screaming noise as it travels. Since the balls used in the remainder of the game are white, and since we also see that the Teatotallers are a horrible offensive team, it is reasonable to conclude that this footage is from some kind of pre-game exhibition, or perhaps an entirely different game entirely.

How do I know I have a good boss? First thing Monday morning, he stuck his head in my office and asked me if I'd seen this yet. When I said that I hadn't had a chance to catch up on my RSS reader, he emailed me the permalink to that post.

From one of today's advance fee scam letters, this one from a dying widower in Kuwait who wants to donate his "huge cash deposit of Ten Million Seven Hundred Thousand American dollars (U.S.$10,700,000)" to charity, but is willing to give me 20% for my time and an additional 5% for miscellaneous expenses:

"I have been diagnosed with Esophageal cancer. It has defiled all forms of medical treatment [...]"

What, it went down to St. Elizabeth's Hospital and knocked over the statue of Mary?

Normally I don't bother posting "your friends list as a Star Trek crew" type memes, because randomly assigning roles is generally boring and irrelevant. This one was more amusing than most, especially given some of the casting choices.

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